Baby outfit and what matters most...

Yesterday started out like every normal day here in the Blazi house. My iPhone alarm went off...I hit snooze a few too many times...and then I proceeded to wake the 3 big's to get them ready for school. I had laid all their clothes out for them and had flipped on lights and told them to wake up. 

Charlie and Addie are up getting dressed...Addie in the dark because she doesn't want any lights on when she is waking up. I can hear Shelby climbing out of her loft bed and then it comes...the crying, the moaning, the lamenting. Shelby has seen her clothes and is not a happy camper. She cries and says she doesn't want to wear that...it's a baby outfit...that she wants something else. I get frustrated and tell her she has to get ready and she has 5 minutes to do that. I go downstairs to get the other kids something to eat and get their coats and backpacks on...all the while the queen is still in distress. Ric goes in...tells her if she isn't dressed when he is ready to go then she is going in whatever she has on. A few moments later she is downstairs...in something I didn't pick out and I was so frustrated. Frustrated at her strong -willed personality...how mis-matched she was...how she couldn't just get dressed every morning like a "normal" kid (and for the record I have gone through this with everyone of my kids...so it's obvious I don't raise normal kids)!!

Ric packs them up in his little car and off they go...and I'm still ill with Shelby. About 2 or 3 minutes after they left my dog is scratching at the door to come back in...I open the door and immediately hear sirens. My heart sinks...my stomach automatically is turning...and I panic. My kids school is 1 mile down the road...but it's a crazy curvy road...a dangerous road...and I panicked. I grab my phone and call Ric it rings and rings and then finally..."hello"...I breath a sigh of relief and say "y'all ok??". He said "yeah, I just dropped the kids off what's wrong?". I told him that I had heard sirens and he knew...knew where my mind had gone. Knew what fears had flooded my mind and he just told me it was ok.

I got off that call and just cried. I cried because I was relieved...cried because I was sick of those fears...and cried because all I could think about was "I fought with her over clothes"! My mind had gone to the worse place when I heard those sirens...and I thought about those clothes...that baby outfit that she wasn't going to wear and the feelings of frustration I had in my heart over it minutes before. In that fleeting moment between the sound of sirens and my husband answering the phone...those clothes didn't so much matter anymore...the trivial things were just that...trivial. And I begged God to give me another chance to do it right. To be a better mom...to have more patience...to not worry about silly stuff.

I went about my morning drinking coffee...folding laundry...playing with little man. I sat down to send a few emails and then I read a few of my favorite blogs. I pulled up Lysa TerKeurst, whom I just love, and began to read her blog...and the tears came. She talked about raising our kids to not be good kids...not the kid that has perfect manners and never makes messes...not the kid who sits still and never acts crazy. I wept because I struggle sometimes...with my kids that is. I want them to be good kids...to show respect...to act right...to not make messes...to not get half of their lunch on their clothes and the other half on the floor. I sometimes worry about what others think of my kids and the people they are.

I love my kids...so very much. I know my kids in and out. I love them for who they are...but sometimes I let this "little" sin of pride sneak in and I want mine to be the best...probably, if I'm being honest, to make myself look better. I let go of that yesterday...let it all go. I determined that what mattered most was not how clean they were...or how clumsy they were...or even how strong willed they were...but that they love God and live for him. They sell out, wholly, for Jesus Christ. That they pray for the lost...that they share Jesus with their friends...strangers. That they know God's word and cling to it. That they realize what matters most...even if their clothes are mismatched and they have sticky stuff in their hair!!!

Thank God for sirens...for mis-matched clothes...for my sweet Shelby Jean...for precious women that write blogs. It was a wake up call for sure...one much needed. I will remember what matters most...and it sure wasn't that "baby outfit"!

Here's to 2012...

Where did 2011 go?? I sit here four days into January and am amazed that this past year went by so fast. It was a good one though.

We did so much last year. It was a year filled with lots of love…laughter…prayer…fear…tears…uncertainties…excitement…growth…passports….and life. That’s what we do around here…we just live life. I love my crazy life…I really do!

We saw the ocean a bunch last year and we spent countless hours riding our bikes and swimming in the surf. It’s my favorite place on earth to be…and I look forward to spending several weeks there this spring and summer! St. Simon’s Island is truly my happy place and I would pick it over any tropical destination. So thankful for my in-laws and them allowing us to spend time with them there at their home!! It’s seriously so cool!!

We surprised the kids and took them to Disney World this spring! It was a dream come true for sure…I never thought we would get to take them. They loved it and we just had the best time. And while it was a dream of ours to go to Disney…while we were there Ric and Josh went to the Ligonier conference and Ric got to meet several of their heroes in the faith…RC Sproul, RC Sproul Jr., and John Piper. They loved the conference…and I loved the pool so it worked out great! Can’t wait to go this spring!!!

This year the kids went on the youth retreat and our mission trip with us. It was good to have them with us and let them see us do ministry and take part in it as well. I was so proud of them this summer on the mission trip and how hard they worked alongside our teenagers. They are good kids! We hope to take them skiing again this winter when our church goes on our family ski trip. They love to ski!!

Ric went to Ecuador twice this year and our lives were forever changed. Our church planted a church in the mountains of Ecuador. Shelby would find a dime on the ground and say “this is for Ecuador”. Ric went just about 3 weeks ago and he got to see the church building almost finished and one day I pray that our entire family will get to go and minister there.

I took a lot of pictures…a lot…kinda thankful for the winter and a little down time. I photographed more people than I count…did 3 weddings…and just loved being behind the camera. I really am grateful for the opportunity God has given me with taking pictures. Hoping to learn as much as I can during this break time and come back in the spring ready to go!

I got to visit with my family more this year than I have in the past. We made the journey up 85 four times this year. It was so good to be there and visit with my family. Living so far away from them for 11 years hasn’t been ideal, but I am so thankful for the time I get to see them!

I once again got to be part of an amazing church body. We have been on staff at the same church for over 12 years. We have been through so many ups and downs in ministry…even times I wanted to just throw in the towel, but thankful that God didn’t let us. We love our church and the people in it. Our kids are there….all the time…so much so, we dubbed them the “church rats”. I was a “gym rat” growing up playing ball….I think I would much rather my kids be “church rats”!! Thankful they love being there and being around our teenagers!

The kids are doing marvelously at school. They are learning so much and enjoy being there…and we love our little school here in town. I am not looking forward to next fall though…all 4 will be in school and then what in the world am I gonna do??? All I have done for the last 10 years is be a stay at home mom….I dread August….DREAD it!! The kids are still playing sports…not sure what this spring will hold for us…last year they all played baseball/softball, but not sure if they want to do that again. I’m game for whatever they want so we will wait and see when it comes around. Jesse started gymnastics this year and is a freak of nature. He does cartwheels and handstands and is unbelievable. He has more body control than I do!!

I have thought a lot about my goals for the next year. I first and foremost just want to know God…get deep in His word and just know Him. I want to really honor Him in every area of my life…in my home…my relationships…my ministry…my photography…my body. I want to do more and be better. So many times I get caught up in the craziness of our lives and feel like a little boat out in the middle of the water…just tossing and turning and floating. I want to, despite how busy and crazy our lives are, to live with a purpose. I was teaching Romans 15 in Sunday school this week and read a verse that stopped me…and it almost brought me to tears. Paul was finishing up his letter to Rome and he was telling them about all that God had done through him and he was just boasting on God and His greatness. He told them about his ministry and why he does what he does and then he said this to them:

“and thus I make it my ambition to preach the gospel, not where Christ has already been named, lest I build on someone else's foundation, but as it is written,

“Those who have never been told of him will see,

and those who have never heard will understand.”

(Romans 15:20-21 ESV)

Those words gripped at my heart…for what they said and for the sad fact that I don’t have a purpose statement like that. Paul, who was one of the greatest men of faith to walk the earth, had a vision…a purpose for his life…and we all know that he was successful in doing what he had set out to do. It convicted me to find a purpose/vision statement for my life…for my family. We have one for ministry, but not personally. I don’t know what it will be…I’m still working on it…but I know I need one.

2011 was good to the Blazi’s…but 2012…it’s gonna blow my mind…I just know it!! To God be the Glory…great things HE has done!!

Don't get crazy...

It's been crazy around here...

I don't feel like I have had time to even catch my breath!  It's a good crazy I guess...but crazy none the less.  We have been super busy with school, church, sports...and photo shoots!  I have had a photo shoot every weekend for the best 2 months and most of the time I have had more than one.  I have loved it, but boy am I ready for a break from it! 

Ric leaves for Ecuador in a few short days and we are super excited for him.  A team from our church is going over to be there for the finishing of the church building in Zhud.  It has been a neat process to be a part of and I can't wait for the days ahead when we really get in and minister to the people of the hill.  I am sad that I am not going, but I just didn't feel like this was the time for me to go.  I will stay home and tend to my flock here...and pray that I make it by myself for a week! 

The kids are in a Christmas parade tomorrow night and are so excited.  They are singing "Little Drummer Boy" and Jesse has parumpumed all over our house for the past few weeks.  He loves to sing! I am excited to go watch them and cheer them on!

Basketball has started and I am coaching two teams...what was I thinking?? I am coaching both of my girls again and am really excited for the season to get underway.  Addie is a natural...and Shelby has an amazing shot for a 6 year old.

Charlie is playing cello at school and I so hope he sticks with it...I love hearing him practice!  It is such a beautiful instrument.  Addie has taken up violin and I love it as well...it's the one instrument that I wish I had  learned to play.  I love music and hope that my kids stay passionate about it!

Shelby Jean is just taking off at school.  She is reading so good.  If she doesn't know a word, then she will spell it out for me and ask me what it is.  It only takes one time and then she knows the word.  I am amazed at how she soaks things up! 

 I am going to try and get back in the swing of things with my blog...I have fallen way behind and have just been in a writing funk!  Looking forward to getting back on here and keeping my family updated on the Blazi happenings!

The Lost get found…even if you have to yell for help…

The kids had fall break a week or so ago and we decided to make the trek up to Virginia to visit with my family. We had an amazing weekend, filled with laughter…lots of food…and fun. I love going home and it really refreshes me…just to be around “my people” and to just be. I love my family…I do. I hate living so far away…something that has gotten to be normal…but never easy!

On Saturday we decided to head up to the pumpkin patch. It was a gorgeous day…the sun was out…there was a slight breeze…all seemed right with the world for a little while. We paid our way to get in…and on a side note…that place was a racket…you have to pay an arm and a leg to get in and then buy tokens to do all of the activities. They made a FORTUNE off of us alone….and I bet there were over a thousand people there in the same time span we were. I am seriously looking into having a pumpkin patch in my back yard next year…I can grow some pumpkins…do a hay ride…have a pumpkin launcher….but I will not be having a corn maze. I venture to say that I will NEVER go in one again!!!

We had done all of the overpriced activities for the day and the last thing we were going to do was the corn maze. There were 4 adult women…and 7 kids. We had a map…clues…we were ready to go. We were taking pictures going in and thinking this is gonnna be so much fun….oh, little did we know. About 5 minutes into the maze we ran across a guy that worked there and he said we were going in the right direction…about that time a family walked up all disheveled…corn in their hair…sweat dripping off their brow (ok…I am exaggerating, but they were in a panic)…”you have got to get us out of here…we have small kids and we are done…we can’t find our way out”!!! That should have been clue #1…note to self!!

We walk around for what seems like forever…we are still laughing at this point. Then we realize that we are walking in circles and we haven’t seen a clue in ages. We soon found a “guide” who told us to take a left than a right…than another left…to get to the next clue. Well, we did what he said and never found the clue and again proceed to walk in circles for the next 15 minutes. AT this point JB is exhausted…he is 3…I have him on my hip…my sister-in-law is carrying her 4 year old…and half the big kids are dragging through the hot corn field…(the breeze had left us at this point)!! I start yelling for help…my mom is done…we just want out of this stupid maze…who cares how we have to get out!!!

We wander and finally see the blaze orange shirt…(a dude that works there)…we tell him he has to get us out…that he isn’t going to tell us how to get out, he is gonna walk us straight through this maze to the exit!!! He begins to walk us and we are soon joined by a few other families…just trying to get out. I ask him very politely…since we just basically threatened him with his life if he didn’t get us out…”you’re not supposed to help us are you?”. To which he replied with his sweet country smile “no m’am…not really”. Well, Mr. “no m’am not really” got us lost a few times and couldn’t really read the map…but then…but then…he realized where we were and within minutes we were at the exit. I threw myself across the table at the entrance and looked that sweet lady in the eyes and said “ never…ever let people with small children go in that maze…ever”!!! She just smiled and said “I told you it was the more difficult maze”…which I sweetly responded with “difficult…how about impossible…your worker even got lost”…and then I told her to have a lovely day…really I did.

We were out and we were done…forget the hayride…we needed a car ride to the closest restaurant so we could get these poor kids something to drink and eat. We laughed about it…the horrible corn maze, but I think we all decided that we won’t make that mistake again. The guys picked at us and laughed…Ric thought it was funny…and then I heard on the news the next night about a couple calling 911 cause they were lost in a corn maze and I looked at Ric and said “see…we aren’t the only people that get lost…and why didn’t I think to call 911???”.

 This picture was taken upon exiting the maze...see how pathetic they looked...oh wait that was the adults who aren't in the picture...

And that my friends was how the lost got found…

Honor...

I photographed a wedding a few weekends ago for one of my first teenagers in youth ministry. I remember the day I met her...she was a tiny little thing...going into the six grade and when she smiled she had more dimples than I could even count. I love this young girl that has grown up before my eyes. There was a time in her life when she didn't love us so much...we aren't the kind of youth pastor/wife that gives up on kids...and when we wouldn't give up on her, she wrote us a note and told us to get out of her life...yeah that didn't work. My husband married her!!! We laugh about it today...she has always had a special place in my heart...no matter what!!

She looked gorgeous on her wedding day...like Hollywood glamour. My son was her ring bearer and thought he was hot stuff...and well, he was. He looked so stinkin' cute that day in his tux and Chuck Taylors. He loves his "Header" and wanted to be beside her all day.

I was taken pictures of the guys...Charlie, her now husband, is a Marine and was in his dress uniform. I loved the look of it, although I think he was horribly uncomfortable. I took pictures of him and his boys...goofing off...being serious...you know the normal. His grandfather walked up while we were taking pictures and Charlie immediately went to hug him. His grandfather was a very important figure in his life growing up...He was a Marine as well. Charlie asked me to take their picture and as his grandfather slung his arm around, Charlie went to do the same. His grandfather immediately stopped and said something to him along the lines of..."you are in uniform". Charlie dropped his arm and stood at attention for his pictures with him.

Some may say that is silly...it's a picture. I'm not in the military and don't have family presently serving, so I don't know what all the "codes" are...what they go by. But it spoke volumes to me what his grandfather said. It was about respect. Respect for the uniform...for his service...for our country. It was about commitment...to a cause...to a ranking. If only we lived our lives as Christians with such commitment!

During the ceremony my husband said these words as he married Heather and Charlie:

"Charlie, you have a rich family history in learning the importance of serving your country from your Grandfather and you now follow in his footsteps and proudly serve as a Marine today. As a Marine you know those Core values HONOR - Marines are held to the highest standards, ethically and morally. Respect for others is essential. Marines are expected to act responsibly in a manner befitting the title they’ve earned. COURAGE - Courage is not the absence of fear. It is the ability to face fear and overcome it. It is the mental, moral and physical strength ingrained in every Marine. It steadies them in times of stress, carries them through every challenge and aids them in facing new and unknown confrontations. COMMITMENT - Commitment is the spirit of determination and dedication found in every Marine. It is what compels Marines to serve our country and the Corps. Every aspect of life in the Corps shows commitment, from the high standard of excellence to vigilance in training.
These very same principles are scripturally commanded and must be displayed in your marriage daily."

My prayer is that I would live my Christian life with Honor...Courage...Commitment.  That I would have so much respect for the uniform Name that I wear...the name above all names...that I would show Him honor with the way that I carry myself.  That I would show courage as I battle through this life that I live.  That I would show commitment to Him above everything else...and that I would stand at attention at all times...for HIM!

but in your hearts honor Christ the Lord as holy, always being prepared to make a defense to anyone who asks you for a reason for the hope that is in you; yet do it with gentleness and respect,

(1 Peter 3:15 ESV)