What hurts the most...

So, being a mom has it's perks! I love my kids. They are so cute and do the funniest things. I love to see them smile, hear them laugh, and watch them play...but I so hate when they disobey!

Tonight at church they decided that the back row where we were sitting with their two friends, was going to be some kind of fun house. They weren't listening to anything, to A N Y T H I N G, that I said. I wanted to wring their necks and at one point snapped and told Charlie's little friend that I was going to crush him if he didn't hush. This was of course after he told me to quit crushing the airplanes that he and Charlie had constructed for their back pew runway. Yes, I later apologized to the little boy for being so harsh...okay, I lied...I later tapped him on the shoulder and made a crushing motion with my hands and than pointed at him. He got a chuckle out of that so I think we are all good now.

On the way home I told Ric about their carrying on up in the church house and he was a little upset with the kiddo's for not respecting number 1, God, and number 2, their Momma! We talked with both of them at length about their behavior and saw both of them genuinely(key word) broken by their bad behavior. Both of them begged me for my forgiveness and this time it wasn't to get out of a spanking. They knew that the hammer was gonna drop..no doubt!

My heart hurt so for them. I was so mad at them at church for acting up that I wanted to crush them...but then seeing their broken hearts(and bottoms)...it was tragic. I realized that my embarrassment will pass(they are preachers kids anyways), that I will get over it, but what hurts the most...seeing my sweet kiddo's broken to the point of tears and me, not wanting them to get a spanking. My mercy kicked in and I wished for once that they would have got off...scott free without a spanking. They were crying, I was crying, Shelby was even crying and she wasn't in trouble...don't worry she will be tomorrow. God showed me tonight that even when there is genuine repentance...there are still consequences. I pray that my children will know this and if it takes a night like tonight to teach them about the consequences of sin...I'll take it!